On 2013

Oh, I know. I could've come up with a better title for this post. But you know what? It's not important.

That's something I learned in 2013. The small details we worry about? They're only worth losing sleep over if they make an impact on your or someone else's life. Of course, everything makes some sort of impact, but the past year has taught me to manage my energies and focus on things that truly matter.

But this post is not about the past. Because while 2013 was full of great moments and lessons learned, the whole point of living is to keep getting better, stronger, happier. And dwelling on past mistakes is not, I have found, the best way to keep you motivated and moving forward. So here are some of my most meaningful accomplishments of 2013, with a new goal for pushing myself further in 2014.

1. "Be gentle with yourself." - Yup, I'm still working on this one. All my health practitioners, friends, family... This is what they repeated to me throughout 2013. When you're dedicated to your work (as I am) and have a tendency towards perfectionism (as I do) and are stubborn about meeting real or self-imposed deadlines (as I am), well... You tend to forget that a healthy, happy life requires balance. Not necessarily in every moment of every day, but overall, balance, or a rhythm of balance, is key to longterm success. And part of that is learning to say "no", which I'm also still working on. So, in 2014, I will endeavour to be gentle with myself in actuality, not just say that I will and then forget to build in "me" recovery time when I'm trying to make everything fit into my schedule.

2. Learn from past mistakes but don't let them bring you down. - Oh, y'all should see my Pinterest boards. There's one called "Life Lessons". Half of those are about finding love. The other half are about making mistakes, learning from them, and not letting others' actions hurt you. In 2013, I finally learned my lesson about friendship. Don't invest into relationships that your counterpart is not investing in. Don't set expectations or make assumptions that your understanding of this friendship is the same as the other person's. Don't let your kindness, love, and thoughtfulness turn you into someone else's puppet. So, in 2014, I will endeavour to make time to pre-assess, assess, and re-assess (that's a teacher joke!) my relationships and voice my concerns early rather than let them build and explode into messy fireworks.

3. Stop doubting yourself and take risks. - This one is about all the new things I tried this year and found I actually enjoyed. Competing in Dancing with the Stars for Easter Seals Kingston. Painting acrylics on canvas for the first time. Writing songs on the guitar, with the intention and the inspiration for the song coming from playing the guitar. Meeting new people, who are now a huge part of my friend-family. Going to new places, because I've always wanted to, and because I could, like re-visiting Savannah, GA and Charleston, SC. Making last minute decisions instead of always planning everything out. A lot of these great moments come from learning to manage my anxiety, so this point is also linked to points 1 and 2. I owe a lot of thanks to my support system, both friends and family and things - yes, things! - because sometimes, you just need to watch your favourite cheesy movie and eat waaaay too much chocolate, and then chips, and cry it all out. And then move on. So, in 2014, I will endeavour to keep taking risks and to stop talking down to myself. Because who is going to stand up for me if I don't even stand up for me? 

4. Just go with the flow. - Surprisingly, while this has always been one of my guiding ideas, it occurred to me this year that I wasn't actually doing this. In moments, yes. In some situations where I found myself confident and comfortable, yes. But overall? HA! You're looking at a perfectionist workaholic planner, here! You think I can just "go with the flow" without thinking it through first? In 2013, I made last minute decisions. I didn't book hotels for my whole trip to the States in advance, and used Hotwire once I figured out, just 2 days beforehand, how I would deal with an unplanned chunk of my trip. That was awesome. That was going with the flow. And it was so rewarding. I also made spur of the moment decisions that go against my usual personality trend. Like deciding to go out after I was already in my PJs, after the time I usually like to get home. Why? Because good friends encouraged me to. And while I like to say they peer pressured me into it, I peer pressured me into it. Why? Because the only way to be comfortable outside of your shell is to actually break out of it. They're baby steps, sure, but it's better than no steps at all. If I can do it while troubleshooting under pressure in my work life or during emergencies, why can't I do it in other situations without triggering a "fight or flight" response? So, in 2014, I will endeavour to just "go with the flow" in unknown situations and try not to freak out or make such a big deal out of it when I do. Everything always works out in the end if you have good intentions. 

5. Love is the answer. - Again, this is something I've always felt. In 2013, I actually found the right words to express it. So, your life sucks. You're broke. Your shower takes forever to heat up, and then gets cold within minutes. So, your friends are actually not your friends (again!) So - and y'all know you feel this way too - 5 friends got engaged, 3 got married, and 2 had babies. Oh, and another one just announced she's pregnant. Oh, and so-and-so got the job of their dreams, and this person from high school you just Facebook stalked is a doctor now?! What?! Yeah. We've all been there. We've all felt that way. (PS: those were fake stats.) It's okay to not be happy all the time. It's okay to be happy for someone yet, oddly, also not. This does not make you a bad person. Love is the answer. Love is always the answer. It's just that sometimes, you have to love yourself more than you love others. Most people, it seems, have the opposite problem: they love themselves more than they love others. For me, 2013 has been about realizing that I've gone too far on that path, and need to come back to me. Put myself before everyone else. Yup, we're back to saying "no" more. But realizing that you're doing it with love, for yourself, and respect, both for you and for the other person you're telling, in advance, that you wouldn't be at your best if you agreed to do yet another thing on that already busy day. Hopefully, that other person is also living with "love is the answer" as their guiding principle and they don't hold it against you. So, in 2014, I will endeavour to trust myself more. To reach into my heart, feel what I feel, allow myself to feel what I feel without prejudice, and let my instinct guide me. Because I know that by holding on to the belief that love is the answer, I can do anything. We can do anything. I can make my little world better, and hopefully inspire someone else to do the same, and this idea, this fundamental truth that love is the only way that it gets better... Hopefully, 2014 will see it spread to those who need it the most.

I don't make New Year's resolutions. First of all, I technically celebrate, like, 4 different new years? So it's hard to know when the "new" year begins and ends. The truth is, it doesn't. There is no clear-cut line in space and time that says, HEY! STOP EVERYTHING. CLEAN SLATE! every time the Earth orbits around the Sun. So this is probably the closest I get to making resolutions. I kinda just make them as I go, as life teaches me new lessons and as the opportunity arrises for more personal and professional development. (This is also why I don't diet, or believe in diets.)

Still, I'm looking forward to seeing what new challenges 2014 brings, and I'm hopeful for new experiences, good and bad, that will help me grow into a better, stronger, and happier person.

Here's to happy continuings! 

PS: Friends don't let friends drink and drive. Or get high and drive. Or drive when fatigued. Be safe out there tonight, friends. Don't take unnecessary risks! Hope y'all have a Happy New Year!

On the Art of Learning

In the past couple of weeks, I have had the opportunity to immerse myself in various forms of art, and it has been a truly marvellous experience, one that has left me feeling warm and fuzzy inside.

Last Friday, my dance partner/teacher Claude Marc Forest and I competed in Kingston's Dancing with the Easter Seals Stars fundraising event. And we won! (You can see our Judges' Choice dance here.) Earlier this week, in my role as Producer of the annual Bachelor of Education Musical at Queen's University, I had the opportunity to listen to so many talented future teachers audition for singing roles. On Thursday, I tried painting with acrylics for the first time (and was amazed at the results!), then went to the opening of the Juried Art Exhibition at the Studio Gallery at Duncan McArthur Hall and chatted with some of the artists about their work and their creative process.

Together, these experiences had me thinking about how I perceive, interpret, learn about, produce, and actually learn to do art, in all its forms. The Faculty of Education at Queen's University does an excellent job at teaching us how to teach, but they also teach us to think about how we learn, so this metacognitive thinking thing has been happening to me a lot, lately. One engagement strategy that comes up in several of my courses is cross-curricular integration, or, in other words, teaching one lesson that meets expectations for several subjects, or simply one that uses another subject to make the lesson engaging. I sincerely subscribe to this idea. For me, anything that can make my lesson more accessible to my students is worth trying.

Recently, though, my visual arts professor presented the difference between doing an art lesson (for the sake of art) versus doing a lesson with an art component, and counting it as an art lesson. It made me think candidly about my own approaches to teaching art and introducing my students to various forms of art that may not ordinarily be accessible to them. It also made me explore the resources that exist in Kingston for students and teachers who are interested in incorporating art for the sake of art by going outside the traditional classroom and into the local community.

I knew that Kingston Symphony offered a "Backstage Pass" to young adults 35-years old or younger - and I have taken advantage of this awesome, massively-reduced deal several times before. What I didn't realize is that the Kingston Grand has a similar deal for young adults under the age of 30, called IMPACT, which means that I can take advantage of "student" perks even once I'm (finally) done earning university degrees! Now that I'm finding myself more drawn to the Kingston art scene, I'm really excited to discover that you don't have to be a student to take advantage of all these awesome deals, like in most other places I've lived.

But that's not even the best part! While doing this research, I also discovered that the Grand offers a fantastic deal for educators who want to take their class (or the whole school!) to an artistic performance, and that it costs just $8 per student! There's a whole brochure indicating which shows would be best suited for students, and it even includes cross-curricular links. I honestly did not expect to find that such ready-made opportunities already exist in the community. I thought that, as a (future) teacher, I would have to do a lot more legwork to make such a great learning experience come to fruition for my (future) students.

My trusty calendar tells me that today is World Student Day. With the week of art immersion I had, and the wonder and amazement I felt at being able to explore so many different art forms, I think that one of my goals for my students will be to make sure that they always know what their options are in terms of taking advantage of the rich arts and culture scene in Kingston. I want each and every one of them to be able to feel this wonder and amazement too! Plus, I'm really hoping that I discover other amazing ready-made resources for educators in Kingston, and for other curricular subjects as well. I would love for my students to become truly connected to their home city through the exploration of curricula subjects in a community setting. This way, I can hopefully instil the idea in them that learning is a lifelong process that can continue well beyond one's school-aged years.

Happy World Student Day! :)

On Community Acupuncture at KIHC

For the past few months, I have been working on getting healthier. Health, of course, is more than just physical, so while I try to keep strengthening my knee, I'm also working on my overall well-being.

Upon moving back to Kingston, I asked for recommendations for places with a holistic approach, as I expected a naturopath might be able to look at my whole health picture and make suggestions as to my digestive, knee/joint pain, and anxiety/stress issues.

A friend recommended Kingston Integrated Healthcare (KIHC), and sure enough, they had a team of professionals that are each uniquely suited to address my needs. Between naturopathy, registered massage therapy (it works better than physiotherapy at this point!) and a new discovery for me, community acupuncture, I'm there several times a week.

Acupuncture, of course, is a traditional Chinese medicine healing technique that uses needles inserted at various pressure points to stimulate the flow of qi, or energy, through the body. People have been telling me for years to look into acupuncture for my joint pain, and I mostly brushed them off. I did give it a try a few years ago, when I was doing physiotherapy for a neck issue, and it did absolutely nothing for me. I gave it another go, just in case it was the first time jitters, but again, I felt more tense than anything after my session. I resolved then and there that acupuncture might do amazing things for other people but that it simply wasn't for me.

Boy, was I wrong! KIHC had their annual Open House the weekend after I moved to town. It's not too far from where I live, so I went to visit as a break from un-packing. One of the Open House demonstrations was acupuncture. I figured since I was there anyway - and pretty sure I was going to start seeing a naturopath there - I might as well try it again. It was, after all, free!

What a difference a good practitioner makes! With just a few well-placed needles - rather than covering my body with them! - Dr. Gerann Murphy gave me this incredible feeling of relaxation in just 10 minutes. It was truly a life-changing experience, and I finally understood what everyone has been talking about all these years!

Of course, acupuncture isn't the most accessible of health treatments, so I was thrilled to discover that KIHC offers Community Acupuncture every Monday, from 4:30pm to 6:30pm. Community Acupuncture allows for you to experience a good 20-30-minute session in a "community" room, as in, with other participants. This means everyone stays fully-clothed, and you don't have as much of a one-on-one connection with the practitioner, but you still get the amazing release of the treatment. And for just $30 in cold hard cash! Plus, if you're like me, you show up early and you still do get to chat and determine what you want to work on for that session! And being the first one there means my session ends up being mostly a solo treatment anyway :)

But despite enjoying this one-on-one time, I just had to share my secret with all of you because since I started acupuncture, my knee pain has been exponentially lower. Even in the crazy humidity we've had, I haven't had nearly close to the joint pain I usually experience. In fact, I barely noticed the humidity in my joints. And then there's the emotional release. Every acupuncture session leads to a huge shift in the energy in my body and all the pent up emotions just... flow. There really isn't another word to describe the feeling.

In other words, for $30, it's one of the most wholesome, holistic therapy treatments I've ever experienced. My plan was to go every once in a while, perhaps bi-weekly, but I've been feeling so GOOD lately that I just might have to go every week. It's worth it. Trust me.

PS: For more information about Kingston Integrated HealthCare, check out their website at http://www.kihc.ca. Or ask me about my experience!

PPS: If you're not sure whether naturopathy or acupuncture is for you, KIHC offers free 15-minute consultations with as many practitioners as you would like to speak to and "test" out. I saw a few of the Naturopathic Doctors and Massage Therapists before deciding who to work with.

PPPS: Nope, I haven't been paid for this post in any way. I just truly appreciate the amazing service and experience I've had at KIHC! And I want everyone else to feel this good!!

On 2012

Dear 2012,

In many ways, you were an amazing year, full of blessings and discoveries. However, in just as many ways, you, 2012, were a year filled with life experiences that forced certain life lessons to be acknowledged, accepted and learned. Hopefully, for the last time.

In 2012, I fully embraced a new position in the sports communications industry. I helped put on an incredible outdoor sporting event. I didn't get to go to the London 2012 Olympic Games, but I applied to go to the Sochi 2014 Olympic Games. I made new friends, new contacts, and learned from new mentors. My life went from 200 kilometers per hour with a million items on my to-do list and lots of positive stress to a screeching halt this summer, still with a million items on my to-do list, but mostly negative stress and anxiety.

2012 was the continuation of late 2011's legacy of exciting new experiences that ended up not working out, or at least not working out nearly as close to the master plan as expected. 2012 was the year of learning who my friends really are, and, most importantly, who I really am. With so many options after this summer's change of plans, I had a tough time figuring out which path to take next. Thanks to a lot of guidance from new and old friends and colleagues, as well as lots of time spent by me, thinking about me, and what I need and want out of my life, I think I have a more or less clear view of what I need to do to live happily.

However, as 2012 taught me, no plan is ever rock solid. My volunteer teaching experience has helped me accept that, and even embrace it - Hello, tossed out lesson plans! I now know that life is no fun when it takes place exactly as expected, although I'm pretty sure everyone will agree that certain key elements make life much more satisfying when they are constant. We're talking living space, career, income, lifestyle, and love. The "big five" I've learned are most important to me in ensuring my own happiness. It should be noted, however, that income is simply on the list because of the type of world in which we live - if you can't afford to have positive experiences without constantly worrying about your banking statement, you're probably spending more time being anxious than enjoying your everyday life.

In other words, 2012 was all about teaching me about balance. What type of balance? The work-life balance, family/friends-alone time balance, eating out-eating in balance, working out-injury balance, spending-saving balance, school-work balance... And, of course, re-learning how to literally keep my balance when re-starting physiotherapy for my chronic knee issue. Hint: proprioception exercises are a pain, but they do work!

So, 2012, it's with a balanced light and heavy heart that I bid you adieu, and thank you for the lessons you taught me. Here's to a safe, entertaining celebration to mark your parting - PSA: DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE!! - and let's welcome 2013 with open arms! May the lessons learned this year be much easier to handle, and lead to much more exciting prospects! The end of 2012 certainly seems to indicate that 2013 will be a wonderful, energizing, fulfilling year, with many warm and fuzzy moments to fill my days - and hopefully yours!

Happy New Year!

On the top 5 regrets of the dying

When doing my media round-up this morning, I came across this piece in the Toronto Star discussing things to know before you die. It sounds morbid, but it's not. Instead, I found it to be inspiring. With thoughts from big names in various industries, it makes for a quick, easy read. 

But it was the first paragraph that captured my attention. Australian palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware collected the thoughts of her dying patients and shared their wisdom and life lessons in a blog called Inspiration and Chai and then in a book entitled The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Here's an excerpt, from the article, with Ware's comments:

“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” 

-This was the most common regret of all. 

“I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” 

-This came from every male patient I nursed. 

“I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” 

-Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. 

“I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.” 

-Many had been so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. 

“I wish that I had let myself be happier.” 

-Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice.

Bonnie goes into more detail for each of these top five regrets on her blog's Regrets of the Dying page. It's worth reading, and a good reminder that the goal of life doesn't have to be to make tons of money and live in a huge mansion full of stuff. Indeed, life's goal might just be happiness and success that comes from within.

I look forward to picking up Bonnie's book and being inspired by the wisdom of those who have led long lives and discovered the things that matter the most.

On travels and tribulations

I just came back from a three-week trek to the US. And what a wonderfully varied trip it was!

First stop, Minneapolis for the 2011 NASSS Conference. I was giving two presentations, though that's against the rules, in theory. But, I wasn't breaking the rules, in theory. My first presentation was actually for a co-authored paper, as part of my summer research assistanceship. You can re-watch Avery-one Has An Opinion: Twitter, Same-Sex Marriage, and the NHL here. My second presentation was based on a paper I wrote last year. Watch Tweeting the Game: Is live-tweeting reshaping the NHL fandom experience here.

But this trip wasn't all business. I did some shopping at Target. Several times. Including at the original store location. I rode a rollercoaster at the Mall of America. And I got to see the local area through the eyes of a co-conference attendee and friend who is from the area. Plus, I got to meet Celebration Generation!!

Next stop, Phoenix, where I stayed with a friend and explored the area for a few days before attending my cousin's amazing wedding. I visited the Heard Museum, an experience that made me smile at all the beautiful symbolism but also deeply angered me. There was so much "othering" in the exhibits, as well as by the tour guide, that I left more frustrated than anything.

I also drove up to Meteor Crater (on Historic Route 66!!), the largest and most well-preserved meteorite landing site on Earth. What an amazing and jaw-dropping experience! It's one of those things that photos just can't do justice, so I won't even bother posting one here. You have to see it in person to understand. The vastness makes for a truly spiritual experience that cannot be replicated. Nature is simply... ungraspable.

The wedding events were absolutely spectacular too. As a part of the family, I was able to attend basically everything, and, as a wedding lover, I was in heaven. On one of the days, between the civil ceremony and the mendhi night, I also got out for a hike! I chose Pietsewa Peak rather than Camelback or Echo Mountain because it was supposed to be less steep. This was the case... in theory. The terrain was very rocky and there were several ups and downs along the way. My knee was very unhappy. But just imagine if I'd gone with a steep trail! After 2.5 miles of my 4ish, I started feeling stabs of pain that made it very tough to walk. It didn't help that the trail indications were a bit confusing. But with some rest and inspiration from a Ms Tracy Lee I met on my last leg, I made it 'til the end!

Tracy told me about her connective tissue disorder, and how her doctors say she should be in a wheelchair. Instead, she hikes Phoenix mountains almost daily despite her torn ligaments and dislocations. And the best part is, she was inspired by me in return! She was glad I took the time to appreciate the mountain when so many locals don't, and despite my recurring knee pain. And all of this started with my simple question about how her Vibram Five Fingers were holding up on the rocky terrain.

After a day of rest, it was time to test my knee on the dance floor... but sadly, I could not bear to even stand in heels. I did dance most of the night away in my flats though, and the fun and cousin time was absolutely worth it!

The one downside of this leg of the trip was our hotel woes. We stayed at the Homewood Hilton in Biltmore-Phoenix. The room was fine... until the card reader decided to stop working on wedding day, leaving us stranded without our outfits and running hours late. After 3.5 hours, two technicians, and two failed attempts to get us in (using a card reader resetting machine and attempting to jack the door), the manager finally decided to take us up on our many many suggestions to try to get in through the window. Within 10 minutes, she was in, having shimmied the locked window "just enough". At ceremony start time. My brother was therefore 2.5 hours late, and I, 1 hour late.

Needless to say, we were very unhappy. We refused to pay for the rooms, and requested a new room. How can I feel safe knowing that, 1. I can get locked out at any time, and 2. Someone can come in through my window in the middle of the day or night and steal my stuff, or worse? But that's all water under the bridge now. The wedding - the part I got to see - was wonderful

Next up, a family roadtrip to the Grand Canyon. Absolutely spectacular. Sunrise, sunset, a few hikes (mini for me, short to average length for everyone else), and amazing once-in-a-lifetime sights. The first day started off on a sour note, though. After all my careful planning, we ran late and missed the very beginning of sunrise. Then, in the afternoon, when my memory card was full, I tried to delete the first batch of pictures, which I had already transferred. For some reason, despite the confirmation message, my camera deleted that morning's batch instead. I was heartbroken. I only discovered this on our very last stop of the day. I lost so many unique shots that the rest of my family didn't get to capture, including shots of them. Thankfully, my SLR captured the landscape, but it's the people shots and the things I wanted to share with all of you that I (still) miss the most. Oh, and to cap off the day, I lost my new thermal hat.

Good news though! Day 2 was better! We found my hat in a parking lot we'd frequented, got to sunrise in plenty of time, and had another wonderful, jaw-dropping Grand Canyon day. And after sunset in Sedona, we hit the road for...

The final stop: Los Angeles for some time with our family there. So much fun! We got to hang out as cousins, I relived my childhood at Disneyland (best part: Aladdin the Musical), shopped at some outlets (and another Target), got an amazing $30 full body massage (Super Relax Massage in Chatsworth. Look it up!), finally saw Santa Monica and biked to Venice Beach from the pier (at sunset!), and had some wonderful food (Mmm... Rock Sugar). Oh, and I discovered my new favourite store ever: Cost Plus World Market. WOW. Walking through that store is like taking a stroll in my brain. But... my camera's acting up again, refusing to focus. I guess it's time for a new toy!

After a quick stop in Montreal, I'm back in Kingston trying to sort out my life. If history is any indication, it'll take me three days to unpack. And then a week to do laundry. But hey, that's what happens when you get back to real life, right?

On vague reflections

Sometimes, the answer is not where you expect to find it. It's not what you've been building up to or what you've worked so hard to accomplish.

Sometimes, finding the answer means going back to the beginning, to your origin story, to see where you belong.

Sometimes, the answer is right in front of you and has been all along. You just couldn't see it because you didn't know you could, or even that it existed.

Sometimes, the answer is something you didn't ever think possible, so you abandoned it long ago. But when the universe opens up that opportunity to you once more, you cannot ignore it.

Sometimes, the answer is doing what you always wanted to do but never thought you could, though you always knew you could, and that you would be good at it, if you could.

I think I have found my answer. And though it will be scary and hard to let go of everything I have become, I don't see how I can live with myself if I don't try.

Because if I succeed, I think I can truly have it all.

Fingers crossed!

On summer

Is it September already? Welcome back to "real life", they tell me when they learn I'm in Grad School. After all, the beginning of September means the return to classes and homework, right? Then I mention that I'm a full-time, year-round student who has been working on research and writing papers all summer. Their response? Usually something along the lines of, "Oh."

For most grad students, the only difference between summer and the "school year" is that your supervisor likely isn't teaching and in fact, might be on vacation. Also, you probably aren't TAing, so you have more flexibility over your activities and whereabouts... as long as you get all your work done on time.

Understandably, the days all melt into one another, and the desire to take extended breaks on beautiful sunny days is often overwhelming. However, work is work and deadlines are deadlines, and at the end of the day/week/month/summer, it all has to get done.

I submitted my thesis proposal to my supervisor last week. THE big task on my summer to-do list will soon be crossed off, once I officially submit it to my soon-to-be-formed thesis proposal committee.

To me, this feels like the beginning of summer. I can finally move forward from all the drama, academic and otherwise, in my life and start fresh... More or less. Though my health issues aren't resolved yet, negative test results are a form of diagnosis, so we're getting closer. I'm feeling secure in my friendships and my connection with the Kingston community. And I really enjoyed my sports TV break, working the LPGA CN Canadian Women's Open in Montreal for CBC, despite the ridiculous weather.

I think I'm getting better at figuring myself out and what I want and need in life. This means I am finally allowing myself to put "me" first at times and do things for myself instead of letting people I like (or want to like me) walk all over me. (Granted, I never let them walk ALL over me, but I did give them much more leeway than they deserved.)

Life, my friends, is good. This is what growing up is all about. And this summer made me realize that you really do keep learning all life long, and you keep growing up, bit by bit, until your life comes to an end.

And now that summer has ended academically, it's time for me to catch up on all the little things you let slide while working away on projects or studying for exams. You know, the cleaning and sorting and cooking real food for dinner. Taking care of yourself and rewarding yourself for all your hard work by actually getting things done in other sectors of your life. This is what summer is all about.

My summer starts now.

On love

A few weeks ago, I stumbled upon the TV show "Double Exposure". It's about two world-renown fashion photographers who dysfunctionally work together even though they're no longer romantically involved. As you can expect, there are quite a few heated discussions. Still, these two obviously love each other. In fact, in this episode, Indrani tells her former lover, Markus Klinko:

"I love you too much to be in a relationship with you."

This sentiment especially resonated with me. Take a moment to think about it. It's one of those "so true" statements. And it got me thinking... in this context, what is love? How do you differentiate love that feels like a relationship but isn't?

Over the next few days, I pondered this question. It wasn't an active thought-process but something that popped into my head every now and then. So, without further ado, here are some of the reflections that came to me in my meditation:

LOVE

♥ does not need to be defined to be true

♥ waits for you to open your heart to it

♥ teaches you to let go & live

♥ is the fire that ignites your dreams & fills you with hope

♥ lights up your heart & everything around you

♥ makes you SMILE!

Hope your hearts are full of love today and all year long.

♥

On Looking Back

I'm not much for looking back. Don't get me wrong, I'm one of the first to jump on Facebook memes like "My Year in Status" but in general, I find that it is more useful to look forward in life. Still, it's important to look back every now and then, whether it's on the first day of spring, on your birthday, at the end of the academic or calendar years, or even at Thanksgiving.

The point of looking back is not to re-live the good times and get down on the bad ones. For me, it's an opportunity to learn from past experiences and be thankful for all the progress I've made, to see how far I've come and where I now stand on the path (or new path?) that will lead me to my goals - and my future - whatever they may be. Whether or not you believe in destiny, I think we can all agree that every now and then, it's good to take stock.

So what tools have I added to my trusty toolbox of life skills in 2010?

Patience. Accepting that some things will never change. Spontaneity. Letting go and learning to truly relax. Venting in private. Trusting my instincts, even when they're saying things I don't want to hear, let alone believe. Rekindled family relations. ENJOYING life, and each and every moment in it, without over-thinking and stressing out over everything's significance.

Quite honestly, I'm still working on fine-tuning a lot of those skills. But I'm getting much better at being a better person, and at being the bigger person.

This past year, I volunteered at the 2010 Winter Olympic Games in Vancouver and Whistler. I finally met my Irish aunt, who has become one of my dearest family members, and my cousins too!

I went to Cuba for the first time. In fact, that's where I rang in the new year, by the ocean.

I did excellent work for an ethical and needy cause by providing media services (and so much more!) as part of the World Partnership Walk organizing committee in Montreal.

I rediscovered nature: oceans and forests, animals and snow, through travel and sport. I had a wonderful time with the outdoors this year and hope to spend even more time enjoying it in 2011.

I visited Kingston, then moved to Kingston upon being accepted into the Socio-Cultural Studies of Sport programme at Queen's University.

I worked for new clients, made new contacts, and learned a lot more about the world of live sports and broadcast production. I also made some great new friends in the industry.

I translated some very interesting museum exhibitions - and forgot to visit the finished product, every time.

I was in Toronto for G20 madness and a wedding, one of many weddings I attended that summer.

I saw friends and friends of friends get engaged, married, and have babies. Not necessarily in that order, and not necessarily the same friends. Many of my friends also started cool new jobs. It was an emotional struggle for me to balance my happiness and excitement for them with my irrational jealousy and "want".

I did a whole lot more reading, at first for pleasure and then for business. Or rather, for school. I hope that 2011 will bring more balance in this area - I would really like to get back to reading for fun!

I went to my first academic conference in a while - and my first as an attendee, rather than as a reporter. NASSS was a wonderful intellectual experience and I learned a lot from it.

In fact, in 2010, I learned a lot about myself, from optimal study habits, to spending habits, to TV-watching habits, to my friend-making habits. And possibly, the most important thing I learned is that "friendship" means different things to different people, and that once you figure out what kind of friendship you have, you can manage expectations and figure out exactly how much to invest in it so you don't get hurt.

Still, I learned that it is important to take (moderate) risks in life or you won't reach the targets you set for yourself.

In 2011, I vow to take more of those moderate risks, to be more proactive, and to stop trying to figure out my life, what things mean, and why certain things happen and just live. I will keep trying to be more patient and will accept that there are some things I can't change, at least not by attacking them head on.

In other words, I will continue to live my life and let my experiences guide the person I should become. I will take care of myself, body, mind and spirit, so I can thrive in this world, no matter where it takes me. I will not make a New Year's Resolution, but I will keep this promise to myself:

No matter what happens, doors will close. But don't despair! In time, another will open. It's up to me to find it and decide whether or not to go through it. But through it all, I will stay "me".

This mantra of sorts has become my new unspoken philosophy in life. It's time to face up, face the facts, and roll with it. Life will take care of itself as long as you try your best to be the best that you can be.

May this lesson from 2010 guide me into 2011. And may it be another blessed year full of life and love, for me and for you.

Happy New Year to all! :)

On taking the time to go out

Most college students don't have issues taking the time to go out and have fun. It's right there at the top of their to-do list, between finding money for rent and trying not to fail out of school.

For me, it's not so easy. Those who know me well know that I'm a 40-year old trapped in a young adult's body. In other words, I'm a serious one. I focus on school work and work work and procrastinating against house work. To be fair, I'm also pretty lazy about actually leaving the house - especially if it involves walking in the cold or at night. Plus, although I'm a late sleeper and riser, I'm very much a homebody. I may not go to bed for 4 hours, but ideally, I like being home by 10 PM. Told you I was an old soul!

All of this to say that I haven't really been taking the time to socialise and enjoy Kingston. Ironically, I think I've seen less of my favourite spots in Kingston since I moved here than in the (total of) 3 weeks or so that I'd previously visited the city. It's sad, I know.

Part of this was getting used to a new environment and remembering all my academic studying tips. Part of it is also my cautiousness when it comes to making friends. I may appear to be an extrovert, but truly, deep down, I'm very much an introvert! And as my friend Mehnaz said so well in this post, introverts tend to be slightly invisible due to their choices. That's certainly how I've been feeling in relation to the other people in my Grad programme, though by no fault of their own! I'm just not a partygoer, and I don't spend a lot of time at school because I work better from home. Understandably, I haven't formed strong bonds with most anybody.

Last week, something changed in me. Maybe it's because I felt more at ease with my workload and the material we've been covering in class. Maybe it's because it's the end of the semester and I just needed to get out. Either way, I decided to jump feet first into socialising and attend Kingston's annual Nighttime Santa Claus Parade. There would be no excuses, even if it was going to be dark and the forecast read COLD! And boy, did I have fun! Parades are always great because you can really get into the celebration as each float goes by, and seeing the excitement in the eyes of the little kids attending really enhances the experience for me. Plus, this one was filled with Christmas cheer and pretty lights - two of my favourites, especially at this time of the year!

I had a wonderful time. To top it all off, a friend and I finally dined at The Tango Restaurant, which I've been dying to return to ever since I checked out their online menu - and their new cocktail list. The whole night sparkled with winter magic and the late walk home was refreshing and invigorating.

Last night, I continued the trend of actually enjoying myself in my town and went out with some of the girls from our programme following our bi-weekly Grad Seminar. Once again, I had a great time, full of stimulating conversation that wasn't argumentative, and laughter! This casual hanging-out made me realise the importance of spending time with others to build bonds. Facebook and school work is nice and all, but they don't spawn friendships. And how else am I going to break out of my introvert shell? My walk home was full of inner smiles and feelings of "I should do this more often."

This time, hopefully, I'll stick to that thought.

PS: Happy Thanksgiving to all my US friends!

On Packing

Packing sure isn't a piece of cake! It definitely makes you crave cake, though, and not just once piece of it! Thankfully, family BBQs and other social events have kept me on top of the cake cravings.

And how's the packing going, you ask? Pretty well. Everything that's not in my bedroom is packed. Lots of things in my bedroom are packed. It's starting to look pretty barren and bare in here. But just because the full boxes are piling up doesn't mean that there aren't many more empties to fill.

Along the way, I've been taking long walks down memory lane, rediscovering the joys and troubles of my childhood. Let's just put it this way: my teenage years were seriously messed up. Old journals from that time period make me cry because I was so completely enveloped in anger and hate and despair. I'm thankful to have grown past that and hope to never sink into that kind of depression again.

But in all the toils and trouble, there are also rays of sunshine. I've uncovered some long lost art and greeting cards, both given and received. Like a hilarious birthday card my brother gave me with two knock-knock jokes in them... his "thing" at the time. Or the beautiful rose my father drew for one of my pre-teen birthdays. Or the birthday card I received from someone named Stephanie (not sure who or when) that said she was happy to be my friend because I'm so generous and always in a good mood. Awwwww... :)

All in all, I'm making packing progress. Apart from day-to-day items and furniture, the only things I have left to sort are old boxes full of files and school work, and the clothes at the back of my closet. With less than a month to go - well, more like 2.5 weeks if you take away my work days - I think we're gonna be good to go right on schedule.

Bonus MRI update: Apart from some irritation and natural wear and tear (aka minimal grade 1 chondromalacia and minimal mucoid degeneration), my knee is fine. Which means all I can do is more physio and more cycling and hope and pray that my knee gets stronger and the pain goes away. At least there are perks!

Bonus research update: If you study hockey from a socio-cultural perspective, we want to hear from you! Two of my (future) classmates and I are trying to organize a paper session for the NASSS (North American Society for the Sociology of Sport) 2010 Conference in San Diego. You can check out the Call for Abstracts here and scroll down to session #13 for details. Spread the word!

On Falling in Love

Why do we fall in love?

Boy or girl, we are naturally programmed to seek out that fairytale ending, our "happily ever after". More often than not, it ends in disaster and pain, but we keep trying, hoping we'll find "the one" some day.

When you meet someone you think you would like to date, do you get excited? Don't deny it... Being with that person makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside. You can't help but wonder how you would be together, if the search is finally over, if this is it, the moment you fall in love for the last time, "the one". Unless, of course, it's a purely physical attraction and those are your intentions from the start. But disregarding that option, if you're looking for a relationship, you might wonder about the future.

For some, these initial long-term thoughts are a test. Do I see myself with this person? Could we still have fun hanging out after the initial spark is gone? Will we be holding hands as we grow old?

It might sound sappy, but it's true. We all do it. It's an internal response system that is meant to help you reject the insufficient options so you don't waste your time. It's not just psychological, in fact, it's more likely biological. After all, male or female, the clock is ticking. There's a sense of urgency to finally finding the security of life-long company, whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, independent or co-dependent, whether you've already built a life for yourself or are just laying down the foundations for your future.

We long for the company of a warm body on a cold winter night, for snuggles by the fireplace and a hand to hold as you walk through the park, someone to share ice cream with on a hot summer's day, someone to comfort you when you're mad or sad and tell you that it's going to be alright. We cannot help but look for it, though we know that it's only when we stop searching that we truly open ourselves up to love, and to being loved.

Why this compulsion that so often leads us in the wrong direction? There is nothing positive about settling for a relationship that is stagnant and prevents you from growing. It's a waste of time and yet we do it anyway. Why do people so often stay in abusive relationships? We convince ourselves that it's not so bad, that our partner doesn't really have that many faults, that he/she doesn't really mean to hurt us, and that maybe, just maybe, we could be a little more patient, give a little bit more, and then, it just might work.

Human beings are lazy, yes, but we don't like to give up. Nobody likes to feel like a failure. We have a hard time admitting that it's just not working. That's why break-ups are so hard, for both sides. No matter how much or how little you've invested in the relationship, by breaking up, you're admitting that you were wrong, it was a waste of time and, more importantly, that your search isn't over. The dreams go out the window when you hear the words: "I'm sorry, you're not the one." And every time, you grieve, as if it was. In your mind, you had already committed your heart and soul. You had already fallen in love. And now, you've lost it all: what you had, what you could have had, what you thought you had. Time to start from scratch, rev up your engine, folks, because the harsh dispiriting search is back on.

It's why we have rebounds. And relapses.

We just cannot fathom being alone, not having someone to share special moments with, not having someone to grow old with, not having someone to die with.

We are afraid of being alone, no matter how much we enjoy it. We'd like to have our alone time during the day but come home to a warm, occupied bed. We want to have it all.

And that's why relationships fail. Because we're trying too hard to convince ourselves that it's the right match. Because we don't want to keep searching, because that's too hard, on the heart, on the mind, on the body... Because we'd rather have the knowledge that things aren't perfect but at least we've got someone to call. Because we'd rather have something than nothing at all.

We fall in love, right or wrong, whether we want to or not, because we need to. Because the very definition of being human is to seek out comfort and acceptance and love. Because it's a biological longing to procreate and to leave something of yourself behind when you go. Even though it means more tears than smiles, more heartaches and crying, more desperation and more pain, we keep trying to fall in love, keep hoping this is "the one", keep searching for our fairytale ending, our "happily ever after".

Why do we fall in love? Because we don't have a choice.

On sharing

As you may know, I'm a huge fan of Wil Wheaton. It's not just his work as an actor or his talent as a writer.

It's because he is honest about who he is, as an individual, a father, a husband, an artist, and a geek. He doesn't hide his true character the way that most of us do, and that takes a whole lot of courage and self-esteem. Sure, he keeps some things private, but that's vital to anyone's sanity and totally understandable.

In his latest blog post, Wil talks about what motivates him as a writer. He says,

All artists are compelled to do what we do, whether it's music or storytelling or painting or whatever. (...) I struggle sometimes to find a balance between just "being" somewhere and mentally recording what it's like to be there, but I don't really have a choice in the matter...

This is exactly how I feel about my craft, whether it's blogging, reporting, or working behind the scenes in TV. In fact, I was so much in agreement with his perspective that I was compelled to add my own in his comments. I said,

Yes. As a writer/journo/TV broadcaster/blogger/tweeter/sharer, I definitely think we're compelled. There's just no other way to explain it. We don't just do it because we like it or want to... we HAVE to.

When I don't write SOMETHING/ANYTHING for a while, I feel all bottled up and stressed and I just have to let it out in some form. Sometimes, I can avoid the actual creative process by doing something related, like singing or playing the guitar. But most of the time, that's just a temporary fix. Like craving chocolate but having hot chocolate instead.

As for the balance... It's really tough to just "be". At least for me. I find it hard to leave the observational, detail-oriented, analytical part of me behind and just enjoy experiences. I always have the need to record and to share, and it's only after much struggling that I can push that need aside.

I've found that going into a situation deciding NOT to report but just to enjoy sometimes helps achieve that "it's okay not to tell the whole world about this" feeling. But not always. Although it does become easier with practice!

Thanks for sharing! :)

And now you know.

On 2009

First off, Happy New Year to all!

Good. Now that that's done... I hope you all had a wonderful holiday season. I was fortunate enough to escape the cold Montreal winter for 7 days in Cuba with my parents on the beautiful beach of Varadero. It was a great experience - my first of hopefully many Cuban escapades! - and yes, I've got a great tan.

And what a grand way to cap off 2009!

They say that what you do on New Year's Eve and Day is a prediction for your year. In that case, 2010 will see me feeling lonely in a crowd but ocean and beach-side, traveling, spending good times with family and missing my friends.

Looks like nothing's going to change.

For me, 2009 was a year of self-discovery.

I put an end to some toxic relationships and pulled myself away from some that might have become toxic. I realized that sometimes, it's okay to put "me" first.

I wrote many proposals and started a few projects and didn't get to finish most of them... but that's just business. I applied for a whole lot of jobs, revamped my CV and re-launched my personal brand as a freelance broadcast TV technician, translator, and online branding specialist. And I designed my very first set of business cards!

I learned not to care so much about the actual work but to cherish the moments, opportunities and people I get to work with instead. I also learned my lesson - more than once! - that politics can wreck perfectly functional business relationships and destroy potentially marvelous opportunities.

I picked up the guitar again, got my very own gorgeous (red!) instrument, and have almost mastered Bm, F, and Bb. I spent time in a choir, which helped me re-acquire some of the vocal range I had lost.

I started reading again and learned how to turn off the TV, the computer, and the BlackBerry... without panicking! I re-acquainted myself with the gift of nature and truly fostered my love for the elements, fresh air and trees, despite my allergies. I fell in love with the activities of my childhood: hiking, paddling, cross country-skiing and simply exploring the wonders of the outdoors.

I spent most of the year in a wonderful relationship that left me a better, richer person than at the start of it. I gained a precious friend, and through him, many more great friends and experiences that I will never forget. I remembered how to love, and more importantly, how to be (and feel!) loved.

I did some yoga, then stopped doing yoga when I got too busy. But I will never forget the relaxation and respiration techniques I learned, and in fact, I use them unconsciously when I get stressed out or have been sitting for too long.

I spent lots of time traveling in planes, trains and automobiles: Toronto, Ottawa, Kingston, Cleveland, Niagara Falls, Lake Placid, Kenya, Cuba...

I devoted myself to a cause I strongly believe in and earned a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see for myself how beneficial my volunteer work - and that of many others before me - truly is, at the ground level. My trip to Africa left me deeply inspired by the hope of a better world and thankful for all that I have and am.

In 2009, I built myself up, higher, faster and stronger than ever before. I picked myself up, time and time again, and struggled with personal and professional aspects of my life. I was unhappy at the surface but happy deep inside. I was angry at life and the world, but felt blessed at the same time. I was presented with a bunch of marvelous opportunities but worked hard to get those offers. I had high hopes for myself and others but was repeatedly turned down and broken down.

If there is anything I learned in 2009, it is to manage my expectations.

Looking ahead, 2010 promises to be full of surprises and blessings. I kicked off the year in Cuba, inspired by the moon, the sun, the sand and the ocean. I will be traveling again in less than a month, going to Vancouver for the Olympic Games. I will make new contacts, new friends, and continue to develop myself, professionally and personally.

I will allow myself to take more time off and spend more time away from the TV and other media. I will continue to read more, focusing this year on all the non-fiction I've been meaning to dig in to.

I will continue to work on being healthier, mentally and physically, and start by simply getting outside more. I will not limit myself with false pretenses and silly excuses but acknowledge my motivations and use them to encourage myself to stay active.

I will laugh more than I have ever laughed. I will live and I will grow. I will cry and be frustrated at times, but that's okay. I will let it all out - privately - then move on. I will enjoy my life, and if I don't, I will take matters into my own hands and make the improvements I seek. I will be the change I want to see in the world.

I will be honest with myself and with others. I will back down when I'm just being stubborn but I won't back down when I am right or defending my rights.

Most importantly, in 2010, I will be happy. I can feel it in my bones, even as I am managing my expectations: whatever happens in the next year, positives and negatives, ups and downs, the sine waves that regulate our lives will leave me with a higher average leading in to 2011. That's not to say that I won't have any deafening lows, but the peaks are sure to make up for that, no?

And so determined, I march in to 2010 with a big smile on my face, because it is sure to be another defining year.

On Linking

I am a sponge. I absorb knowledge and I can't stop sucking it all in, even when I'm full. It's an unquenchable thirst, a never ending search.

People say I post cool links. Whether it's on Twitter, on Facebook or by email, they laugh, cry and wonder along with the variety of stories I help them discover. The truth is, as with anything else in life that is successful, I have a little help from my friends.

I don't find all these stories by myself - I'd never sleep! No, instead I rely on a well-knit network of sources who provide me with the most interesting articles in their niche and other stories that tickle their fancy.

Back in the days before Twitter, I did a lot more link exploring than I do now, but mostly because I wasn't satisfied with just the stories my Facebook friends posted (no offence!). My RSS feeds weren't enough to keep me occupied either. So I browsed Yahoo! News -gotta love their oddities section! - and clicked through Propeller and other sites I stumbled upon through previously linked stories.

But Twitter! Ah, Twitter changed everything! Now I have access to a wealth of stories in all kinds of interesting fields and - dare I say it? - sometimes too many articles to read! I often end up simply browsing before retweeting or Facebook posting, and then I'm forced to awkwardly add a belated comment on the story. (The secret is out!)

Still, I do end up reading everything I post, though certain links sometimes remain on my desktop all day or taunt me annoyingly from a perpetually open browser window.

At least I've evolved from my early Facebook years, when I felt almost compelled to post nearly every story I came across. It's a wonder my friends didn't de-friend me for spamming them with links! (Although in those days I guess they didn't really have to see them if they didn't want to).

I've often thought of turning this obsession into a potentially profitable venture. Why not collect all the cool stories I find and turn my blog into a news wire of sorts? Because then I would be forced to comment on each and every link when some of them deserve nothing more than a "Heh. Interesting." or are posted more for general knowledge than life-enhancing purposes.

Someone recently suggested to me that I might use my link-finding talents while hosting a radio show. Sure, that could be fun. But then the pressure of finding cool, creative and original stories each and every day would definitely take the enjoyment out of it. And who needs all that extra stress?

The fact remains that I post stories because I'm interested in them or because I think people should know about them. It is a truly selfish endeavour, at once feeding my incessant need to know (NOW!) and making me look fairly sociable - not to mention knowledgeable!

So while I have my reasons for retweeting and reposting, I am left with a feeling of emptiness at the end of the day, when my prolific sharing has resulted in no interesting conversations or additional sharing by others. Which is why I always appreciate the "likes" on Facebook... Simple and to the point: it can loosely be translated into a "This is cool, thanks for posting!"

And since I post mostly for me (now that I've gotten over my awkward Facebook adolescence stage), it always warms my heart to hear someone say in a private conversation when I'm starting to think no one is reading: "I really enjoy all the links you post." These comments are always exquisitely timed and give me a renewed enthusiasm for sharing what I think is cool with my little slice of the world.

But I wonder... Why do you post links?

P.S.: You're welcome.

Only the Lonely

I had an absolutely wonderful weekend.

A bunch of my friends and fellow Habs fans from various places in North America congregated to Montreal so we could all enjoy a couple of days of hockey, friendship and good food.

And it was fabulous. From the tunes on Friday night, to hockey pool picks on Saturday afternoon, to a delicious Italian dinner and, of course, Habs vs. Rangers at the Bell Centre at 7pm, we all had a ball.

And now, I'm sad.

I'm sad because my friends have left town and this city I call home feels a little bit colder now that they're gone. Even on this beautiful sunny Sunday with its crisp autumn air (and winds gusting up to 50km/h!!), I felt lonelier than on those previous bone-chilling, wet, rainy days.

With all the turbulence in my friendships in recent times, from those that ended because of lack of commitment or a misunderstanding, to those that turned out to be less substantial than I thought they were, to the one-sided friendships, and the relationships that have become simply friendships... Well, it's sure been a lot to take in. I have learned a lot, grown from my experience, and am ready to move on.

But having all these wonderful people around for the past couple of days, real friends, who care about you in the good times and the bad, who check up on you even with an email or chat, who only see you once a year yet know you so well...

These are the friendships I cherish the most. These are the friendships I am so blessed to have. These are the friendships that leave a void. These are the friendships that only the lonely know.

(Incidentally, you can read the excellent Habs-related rants and raves of one of my aforementioned friends at The H does NOT stand for Habs).

Flashbacks

Ah, the things traveling will do to you! It's a different environment, a different way of life... sometimes a different language and in this case, a different continent and a different worldview!

Coming home from Africa was quite an eye-opener, and I don't mean all the time I spent in the plane or waiting in airports!

The trip as a whole didn't impact me too much while I was there. It was when I came back and compared the reality I was just in with my everyday reality that I realized how fortunate we really are. Then again, there is also poverty here in North America... it's just not as painstakingly obvious.

Here are some of the flashbacks that I noted during my first two days back from Kenya. These are things that happened exactly like in the movies... Someone said something or I saw something that brought me back to my Kenyan experience.

* First and foremost, how weird is it to wake up in your own room, in your own bed, and not knowing where you are? It's very confusing, trust me. It took a good while to remember that I was home... and this didn't happen to me in any of the hotels I stayed in, or ever before!

* When I first brushed my teeth, I felt like something was missing... Water. Or more specifically, a water bottle. In Kenya, as per the travel clinic's orders, I used a water bottle to wet my toothbrush as well as to rinse my mouth after cleaning my teeth.

* More water woes... I'm so used to taking a sip or two of water when I was my face or in the shower. It was very hard for me to remember NOT to do that while I was in Kenya. Again, the travel clinic instilled fears of getting sick from the tap water deep down into my core. Good job!

* What about water pressure? There are places here where your water pressure isn't that great... namely cheap hotels or apartments. Luckily, the hotel was pretty good about strong shower streams, though there were times when the water would randomly stop, and sometimes you had to turn the tap completely to get a decent flow. Some places, even that didn't solve the problem. It made me wonder how people feel clean, especially when you have to wash that red Nairobi soil off the soles of your feet.

* Hey, guess what! I can plug my laptop directly into the wall! Yes, after 2 weeks of using adapters "African-style", as someone put it, it came as a bit of a surprise to me to be able to just plug it in. The "African-style" comment came after the porter helped us with my so-called universal adapter. Unfortunately, all the plugs at the hotel were UK, and my adapter was stuck on Europe. Cheap plastic! After trying to find us a spare adapter somewhere in the hotel, he took one look at mine, grabbed a pen cap, and pressed down the trigger in the top hole before inserting my European adapter into the UK plug. Fantastic! Only in Africa...

* My mom and I were lounging in the backyard when she said something about one of her plant attracting bees. I flashed back to the bee-keeping project we visited in rural Mombasa... I promise to tell you all about it later.

* I went for a drive a couple of days after I got back, or possibly even the day after I got back. I was at a stop sign and trying to figure out what the car opposite to me was going to do: go straight or turn. You know Montreal drivers. They rarely signal, especially on suburban streets! I tried to make eye contact with the driver and it took a few seconds before I understood why I wasn't reading any signals... I was staring at the passenger! Note to self: Drivers sit on the right in North America, not on the left.

I'm sure there were other moments that reminded me of life in Africa, but these are the fun that I noted. Spending time away from your reality also makes you realize what's important to you and what's not. Sorry, Perez. You didn't make the cut!

It's all coming back to me now

I had been meaning to blog more about Africa earlier, but working Rogers Cup tennis for 7 straight days basically took up all my time. It was eat, work, sleep, and lots of transit. But, I did manage to make some professional gains. It was my first gig as a bug operator for CBC, which means I was responsible for putting the scoreboard and stats in... and updating it too! This means I really needed to understand tennis, and after 4 days of actively watching it, I managed to figure it out :)

But back to the topic of the day: Africa.


I've already given you an overview of the trip, and I do plan on going into more details about some of our visits, but I think it's also important to understand how different the worldview is, or, as it turns out, how similar life in Kenya is to life in Canada.


Things that are the same... but not

* Slowpoke! *

Ya know how when you're driving, and the car in front of you is driving at a snail's pace and you just wish they'd change lanes and let you pass? You're gonna flash your high beams, aren't you? Well, in Kenya, they do that too! It's not a big realization, but it definitely showed me that some things we believe apply only to our culture are actually more universal than we think! And in East Africa, you don't get deer or moose crossings, but cow crossings. One time, our matatu nearly hit a cow to try to get it to cross faster. It wasn't impressed. It moo-ed at us and hit back!

* The stars *

Well, they're not the same because we're in different hemispheres, but they are just as beautiful. The difference is that in North America, you see stars lower on the horizon, while in Kenya, you really have to look straight up. I had a blast hanging out at the outdoor lounge at the Serena Mombasa, lying back and watch these natural gems sparkle. One night, three of us even saw a shooting star! My first confirmed sighting, and what a sight it was!

* Media *

During our visit of the Nation Media Group facilities, I came to a startling realization. The more I listened and looked around, the more I was certain that while the media values, facilities and equipment are the same in Kenya as in North America, the East African newsrooms are evolving at a quicker pace. I believe that's because they're learning from our mistakes and successes. Basically, they're skipping the middle step, the trials and errors we made trying to achieve better quality and smoother content. Kenya is going digital this year. They're not in HD yet, but that's the next step. While here in Canada, we're struggling with upgrading from analog to digital because of the cost of the equipment, East Africans are at a natural equipment-replacement point and are able to purchase high end HD equipment as part of the renewal process. We tried to do it all too fast... We're in HD, but not true HD: True HD means that shooting equipment is HD, Audio is 5.1, transmission is HD, cables/transmitters are HD-capable, receivers and watching equipment are HD... If even one element is in standard definition, it's not HD. In Africa, they love gadgets. It won't be a problem to get people to buy HD TV sets, especially given that most people would probably be getting them as their first sets.

*Gender balance*

Most of the Frigoken factory workers in Nairobi were female. However, this was done by choice, not because of gender bias. Sure, women are detail-oriented and good with veggies, but does that mean they should be the ones assigned to snap the tips off green beans? The reason Frigoken employs mostly women is because this job allows them to provide a secondary income to their families. In some cases, it is the only decent job a woman with relatively little education can get in the city. And they make it easy too... The plant offers a drop-off daycare service in one of the adjoining buildings, and if I understood correctly, it's free! How many North American plants can boast the same? Also, many of the farmers in the village were women, although their husbands may own the plots.


Things that really are different

*The buses*

You've already heard the stories... The matatus run on a completely different system than our North American transit. It's more of a taxi-like system, regulated by the government to some extent in that drivers have to register their vehicles and pay some sort of fee. It's also like taxis because the drivers are absolutely insane. That's where the similarities end, though. Matatus are little white Toyota minivans/SUVs, often covered in all kinds of slogans and celebrity names. The most popular ones? Tupac and Obama buses. The slogans sometimes don't make sense... Why would an East African matatu driver decorate his bus to the theme of the Minnesota Wolverines? (No, not Michigan) Or "The Game"? Matatus decide to patrol specific routes, but pick people up and drop them off anywhere along that road or in that neighbourhood... And at the rate that these buses pass, you can probably get anywhere on time! Sometimes, you could see multiple matatus pulled over alongside the highway, trying to get people on board for the 2 Kenyan Shillings fair, which more or less converts to 2 cents.

*What time is it?*

In Kenya, you really can set your clock to the sun. Every day, without fail, the sun rises between 6:30 and 6:45 and sets between 6:30 and 6:45. It's absolutely amazing! You figure that's how villagers go by their day... So very impressive.

Nairobi vs. Mombasa

*Nairobi*

Nairobi is like any other metropolis: busy, constantly moving, full of people crowding the streets. In fact, it reminded me a bit of NYC. The only difference, of course, is the predominant skin colour on the downtown streets. But they're all in suits and briefcases, going about their day.

*Mombasa*

Mombasa, on the other hand, is totally a beach resort... Until you get to the main part of the town. There, you can definitely see the different levels of poverty, which are much more obvious than in the Nairobi outskirts. It's not just the shantytowns... From the moment you leave the Mombasa airport and until you reach the touristy beach resort, you can see the true face of East African poverty.


Those are just some general observations about my trip to Kenya. Next post? Coming home, and realizing how different life truly is from one end to the world to another.

Stay tuned...

Has it really been that long?

Once again, though I promised myself I would update my blog more regularly, I somehow managed to go without creating a new post for a whole month! This is despite adding it to my "TO DO" list on a regular basis.

Proof that sometimes, life happens.

The World Partnership Walk was a complete success by all standards: The on-stage entertainment was spectacular, from the MCs to the dancers and musical performances. We finally got our cake - to celebrate the 25th anniversary - and ate it too!

In terms of media, the Walk garnered lots of media attention. I did an in-studio LCN interview on the morning of the Walk, which attracted a reporter from Radio-Canada Première Chaîne, a reporter from Quartier Libre, an alternative publication from Université de Montréal, and a photographer from Le Devoir. We also had pre-Walk coverage from CPAM and CJAD. All in all, that's pretty good coverage, especially when compared to the previous years.

The turnout was exceptional too... Over 2,500 people attended the Walk in 2009, which is more than ever. By comparison, the 2008 Walk only drew 1,500 attendees. Montreal not only met its fundraising goal, it surpassed it by at least 60K! We raised over $200,000 on Walk Day.

After the Walk, I went on vacation to Kingston for about 10 days. Didn't spend much time in Kingston though. Instead, we went to Toronto for a few days, to Canada's Wonderland and the Toronto Metro Zoo. What fun times!! The rides were awesome, and the animals were adorable. Plus, I got to meet a few new cool people.

We also went canoeing on Gould Lake and had an island picnic, did a little roadtrip to the Sandbanks' Dunes Beach for a hot steamy day of sand, tan and splash... Here, we spent some time in the water tossing around the Frisbee and tiny little fish would approach us and bite our toes! It actually felt really nice... like a well deserved foot rub! But even better, when we were still for a while, a larger fish (possibly a steelhead trout?) came swimming around our legs. First one, then another, and another and all of a sudden, there were dozens! The best part, for me anyway, was this fish swimming up to me cautiously, then swimming through my legs, brushing my left leg a bit, then getting freaked out and hurrying through... then coming back alongside the other leg and brushing that one too!! It was absolutely awesome!

One of our other roadtrips took us to Carleton Place on the outskirts of Ottawa, where we had a delicious dinner with yet another fantastic couple. In fact, this trip was full of little excursions, new discoveries - both on the road and at our various destinations, and, most importantly, I got to meet lots of great new people. Yes, I would say I've made new friends :)

Back from Kingston and back to real life... I went straight to the World Partnership Walk Montreal post-mortem meeting, and then returned to my daily routine of translating, applying for various broadcast, new media, marketing or communications jobs.

Then this weekend, I attended the 2009 NHL Entry Draft in my hometown, Montreal. What a blast! I met some more great people - though not at length because of my back to back scheduling - and enjoyed the whole experience, overall. Of course, the night was a bit long at times, especially since the first few picks went exactly as expected and Montreal was only picking 18th. Lucky for me, I was able to meet up with some of the folks I traditionally work with at Bell Centre events and catch up on the past few months. That was definitely a thrill, as was meeting the Habs' first rounder pick, Louis Leblanc in front of the Sheraton Hotel later that night.

Did I mention the TweetUp? The organizers of the NHL Draft Tweet Up are exceptionally talented... Even though I didn't attend the second day of the event - gotta have a lazy day every now and then! - I've got nothing but praize and thanks to offer. Thanks to their great organizational skills, the NHL sponsored the event by offering 50 complimentary Draft tickets (valid for Friday and Saturday), which is how I ended up there in the first place!

In summary, it's been a pretty hectic month... especially when I got the news that I was GOING TO AFRICA!

That's right, folks! A the end of July, I will be taking a 17h flight to Nairobi, Kenya to participate in the Aga Khan Foundation Canada Awareness trip. Basically, the Foundation selects certain people that they think could benefit from the experience of seeing AKFC-sponsored projects first-hand, obviously to help further the cause by acting as its ambassadors. I was chosen because of my involvement with the World Partnership Walk. And as you should know by now, 100% of the profits from the Walk go straight to these AKFC projects, which means that I'm paying my own way all the way. It'll set me back a cool $5,000 but given the cost of doing this kind of voyage on my own, there is absolutely no reason why I shouldn't participate in this programme.

We will be spending a few days in Nairobi and some in Mombassa, and the fact that we're travelling in groups and with local guides will help ensure our safety throughout the trip. I can't wait to see all these places for myself, experience the sometimes troubled culture of East Africa, and hang out close to where my mom's side of the family used to live. Plus, I'll probably get to see some pretty cool creatures in their natural environments. Overall, it'll be an excellent learning experience, no matter what I choose to do with the rest of my life. If anything, it'll help me better understand a different demographic of the world... and who can argue with the benefits of that?

Of course, I will take lots of great pictures and keep a journal so I won't forget to update you.

Stay tuned...